WHAT COMES TO MIND when I think
of the Pastoral Counseling Center and its work? First, I think of the Director,
an ordained pastor, and a man possessing an uncommon tenderness for people and
for life. The Center’s commitment to blending of psychotherapy with religion
is clearly represented by the founding and housing of offices under the
sponsorship of local area churches and its expansion to offices in new,
sponsoring churches in surrounding towns. The counselors of the Center are a
referral resource to area pastors. People who seek counseling find support
within this setting for their healing and growth. Contributions from churches
and individuals enable the Center to give help to all who enter its doors.
Earl Thompson, former President, First Church of Christ, Congregational,
Glastonbury.OVER THE PAST FIFTEEN YEARS AS THE PASTOR at Congregational Church of
South Glastonbury, I have referred dozens of church members to the Glastonbury
Pastoral Counseling Center for therapy. This I do with confidence. Bob Henderson
has assembled an extraordinary staff of pastoral counselors whose areas of
expertise cover all the bases. Whether it's a couple needing marriage
counseling, an individual dealing with substance abuse, a teenager wrestling
with depression, a family not communicating, the clinical staff is trained and
can effectively be of great help. Whatever the problem; I offer the Pastoral
Counseling Center as my first line of referral. For this partnership in ministry
I am totally grateful. It's hard to imagine doing pastoral ministry in this town
without the professional services available through this Center.
Rev. Richard Allen, Senior Minister, Congregational Church of South
Glastonbury
RECENTLY I WAS WITH A GROUP OF FRIENDS talking about counseling.
One man said do you think everyone need counseling? I responded that
everyone deserves counseling!
If any of you are thinking of counseling,
without any reservation, I suggest you see Dr. Robert Henderson,. He is skilled, honest, has
great integrity, and a warm heart. We did some training together and he continues to grow and develop as one of the best counselors in
his field.
Rev. Dr. Doris Moreland Jones, Pastoral Counselor, Louisville, Kentucky
WHAT I KNOW is that many church and non-church
people turn first to a local pastor for help in a crisis. There is a perception
among many that clergy are equipped to walk people through their trials. After
26 years of ordained ministry, I find that I can often enable people to make
normal adjustments to normal life changes. Typically, in three to five sessions,
individuals or couples or families discover a new way to communicate or to
resolve a conflict or to draw upon an inner resource.
However, when I see that people are not making an adjustment to the change(s) in
their lives, I refer them to the ministry of the Glastonbury Pastoral Counseling
Center. In that setting of trained therapists, I have confidence that those I
refer will find the healing they seek and the reconciliation that was beyond my
level of expertise. The one phone number I have memorized and which I give to
people several times a month is 659-0183.
Rev. Richard Allen, Senior Minister, Congregational Church of South
Glastonbury
I WAS INTRODUCED to Dr. Robert Henderson and the Pastoral Counseling
Center through a friend. I had encountered some difficult problems in my life
that was affecting my family and me. I met Dr. Henderson and right off felt I
could talk with him and explore the concerns in my life. Several months later I can say that the help I received was meaningful,
significant, and real in that it has helped to change my life. There are times
when you have to look at your life and come to grips with changes you must make.
I know this was done in my life and I feel better for it. I would recommend the Pastoral Counseling Center to anyone that I know in
need of the services. The counseling services are rendered effectively and
professionally. As I reflect on my experiences there I can certainly say that it
is a gift and blessing that such services are available for those in need. I am thankful for the awakening I received about myself through counseling
sessions at the Pastoral Counseling Center and my family is thankful also.
Charles Williams, Attorney, Bloomfield, Connecticut
IT HAS BEEN MY EXPERIENCE that the Pastoral Counseling Center offers an
atmosphere of safeness and acceptance to explore all things that had happened to
me. From the life tornado that can suck us up, toss us around in its black
scarey funnel to the smaller bump in the road. A
place where I could look at myself and learn about anger, sadness, pain ,and
joy. And there was someone there to guide, listen and sometimes disagree
with me. Beyond that it offered a quietness where I could explore my
spiritual life as well. I know where to go when my life
feels "out of balance".
L.N. Berlin, Connecticut
I FIRST CAME TO THE PASTORAL COUNSELING CENTER about a year ago in crisis
of mind, body, and spirit. I was starting on a path of recovery from drug and
alcohol abuse, my marriage had failed. I had no job, and I was bereft. I knew
that if I hoped to live I would need help rebuilding my life from the ground up.
I found support, love, hope, honesty and a sound spiritual approach at the
Center. Through individual and group sessions, and in concert with other medical
professionals and a 12-step program, my life has changed. The Center has been
there through the toughest times, and I could not have walked this road alone.
B.F. Manchester, Connecticut
I HAVE BEEN A FRIEND
and observer of the Glastonbury Pastoral Counseling
Center since its beginning and have known Dr. Robert Henderson for over 30
years. I would like to take a few moments to say a few things about what I
perceive to be some of the advantages and opportunities which exist for the
greater Hartford area through the GPCC.
First of all, I have no doubt that the longevity and success of the GPCC is
because of the excellent leadership it has experienced under the direction of
Dr. Henderson for all these years. I know Dr. Henderson well and know that he
possesses both the creative mind and everyday common sense to create a center
that can provide the unique service which I believe the GPCC does provide. I
know him to be a person with excellent skills and capacity to care,
therapeutically and pastorally.
Secondly, let me comment on a few of the benefits which I believe the GPCC
provides to your area. It is a rare thing today when a person can go to a place
to find expert guidance for some of life's most complex human problems and in
the same place find refreshment for a hungry/thirsty soul. So often these two
aspects of life are seen as disconnected, but I am well aware that at the GPCC
there is a strong awareness that "real" life and spiritual life are
intimately connected.
I know of the background and excellent training of the staff members at GPCC. I
would have no hesitation in referring a great variety of individuals with an
array of "problems in living" including those individuals who may not
even be able to state the exact nature of their difficulty beyond being one of
the burdened, burnt out, or overwhelmed individuals we are likely to meet in
today's society. I believe that the GPCC provides a great resource and
opportunity for the sufferers, lay-people, pastors, other religious leaders and
other professionals of the Hartford area. I am very happy to be a friend and
advocate of the GPCC.
Dr. Tyler Dudley. Buffalo, New York
Diplomate, American Association of Pastoral Counselors
Supervisor, Association for Clinical Pastoral Education
HOW WELL I REMEMBER those days so long ago when I would hear about this
growing and thriving pastoral counseling center in Glastonbury. I was the
Director of the Pastoral Center, our pastoral counseling center at the Hospital
of St. Raphael and later, an independent counseling center. I kept hearing about
Dr. Bob Henderson, this fine therapist, CPE supervisor, and devout Jungian. He
had done his doctoral work at Andover Newton, as did I. I wanted to meet him.
I don’t remember the first time I met Bob, but I do recount with great
fondness the many hours spent on the tennis court and later (when tennis became
too painful), the golf course. Indeed, this man who I admired from a distance
became a close friend, colleague, confidant, and buddy. He and I joined with 2
other men to begin our own male support group in the 80’s. Words cannot
deliver the message of how important this support was to all of us. We met every
month for 10 years. How rich it was!
I write, not to reminisce about those wonderful days but to tell you of the
wonderful tradition of service at the Glastonbury Pastoral Counseling Center. It
has served so many in a faithful and creative way over the years. Dr. Henderson
has developed into a well-known expert on Jungian thought and on the giants in
the field who are foremost authorities on Carl Jung. He is a sensitive, caring
pastor at heart who is exceptionally well trained in clinical skills.
When I did my doctoral thesis, one of my hypothesis which I proved was that
Pastoral Counseling Centers are a place where most people come first for help.
That is so true of Glastonbury Pastoral Counseling Center. Most of the clients I
suspect have come because they perceive it as a place of care, a place where
they can receive high quality, confidential help. It is not, by and large, a
place where people with long-standing psychiatric issues come to be maintained
on medication, as important as that is to many in our society. It is a place
where you can get highly qualified assistance in working out the sometimes
painful issues that face all of us as we live out our spiritual journeys. One of
the best is in Glastonbury, a source of deep pride for you all.
The Rev. Dr. William Baugh Tampa, Florida
Fellow, American Assoc of Pastoral Counselors
Former President, Association for Clinical Pastoral Education
TODAY’S WORLD CAN give all of us reasons to find a place and person
to talk about personal issues and wounds in a safe and respectful environment.
Though there are many such places and peoples, pastoral counseling centers
are especially unique in what they have to offer. Not only are staff well
trained clinically, they are also especially well trained to be sensitive to the
spiritual context in which our struggles are played out and resolved.
Peoples of all denominations, religions, and non-religious orientation are
respected for the psycho-spiritual struggles and dramas affecting them.
When a person enters the door of a Pastoral Counseling Center, they enter
what the Greeks once called a "temenos", i.e., a safe and sacred arena
or santuary that provides a foundation for any potential healing. Issues
are received in a respectful, non-judgemental and professional manner, honoring
confidentiality and the unique life journey of each individual. Here, both the
surface of our lives and our deeper selves will be compassionately engaged.
The Rev. Dr. Fred Gustafson Watertown, Wisconsin
Diplomate, American Association of Pastoral Counselors
Jungian Analyst, Chicago Society of Jungian Analysts
Most of us, if we are honest, know that there are times when we need
outside counsel. While there are many avenues to which we might turn, I have
found that pastoral counseling addresses both the psychological and the
spiritual needs most fully. I would recommend pastoral counseling especially to
those working through mid-life issues. It is an awesome experience to be
accompanied on our journey by a sensitive listener and a respectful guide.
Sister Colette Hanlon, S.C.
Director, Department of Pastoral Care
New Haven, Connecticut
I was talking with one of our
parishioners not too long ago who shared with me her experience about
pastoral counseling, giving me permission to share it with others. She
said, “I had done years of therapy, but when I went to a pastoral
counselor I had my biggest breakthrough. It was then I discovered I
needed more than just intellectual understanding of my situation; that
what I really needed was my faith in God to help me through. It was
the missing piece, the missing tool, so to speak.”
About a year ago, we at Asylum Hill Congregational Church (AHCC)
entered into a special partnership and collaboration with the Pastoral
Counseling Center, whereby Bob and Janis Henderson would spend part of
a day each week at AHCC. We are excited about this relationship
because it enables our pastors to make an immediate link for
parishioners and others who might benefit from pastoral counseling in
an environment in which they feel safe and comfortable. We also
treasure, as the above story exemplifies, the honoring of a person’s
spiritual journey as part of any counseling or healing process.
In addition to their counseling, Bob and Janis have also led a course
and ongoing group on dream interpretation, and Bob at times has
participated in the worship leadership of our church. To date, the
pastors have had nothing but positive responses from those who have
identified themselves as seeing Bob or Janis.
- Peter Grandy Sr. Assoc. Minister, Asylum Hill Congregational
Church, Hartford
For Seven Years the pastoral counseling center has had a satellite
office in the Woodward House of First Congregational Church in East
Hartford. Main Street East Hartford is convenient to bus lines and
there is ample parking. East Hartford has many low income citizens for
whom counseling fees can be difficult to meet and for whom
transportation can be problematic. The church is pleased to know that
its facilities are being used in this way to bring to our friends and
neighbors the wholeness of life which God desires for all people. As a
pastor, it is wonderful to be able to refer people to the Counseling
Center knowing they will be able to attend counseling sessions at an
attainable location on a sliding fee schedule. The presence of the
counseling center is an important part of the mission of First Church
to reach out to meet the needs of its community. We are proud to be in
partnership with the Counseling Center and pray with you for every
success of its ministry.
Rev. Dr. Ted Mosebach, Senior Minister, First Congregational Church.
East Hartford
Two high school aged sisters from my church were members of a
field hockey team that vied for the Massachusetts state title. I
followed them faithfully that season, taken by their passionate play,
150% commitment, team work, and full hearted play. Almost every game I
found tears coming to my eyes, and I didn't understand why. Something
was going on inside of me that was triggered by this field hockey
team. I didn't feel anything was "wrong" with me, but that something
was happening I didn't comprehend. The tears were a symptom of
something.
When the team won the semi-finals, the girls, exhausted and muddy,
fell on each other in the middle of the field with total abandon.
Screaming. Crying. Laughing. Hugging. And I was uncontrollably reduced
to tears. At that moment I thought, "I have to get to the bottom of
this."
So I went and to see a Pastoral Psychotherapist. I had seen one before
and appreciated how sensitive she had been and how she didn't balk at
my desire to include issues of faith in our discussion. This time the
therapist was a man who I saw for several months. He wondered along me
about this eruption of tears. Was I grieving a loss? I chewed on that
for several weeks. I was a football and basketball player in high
school. Was I grieving the loss of my youth? He wondered aloud about
what it was, exactly, that evoked the tears. I thought and thought.
"The abandon with which they played and the total commitment they had
to each other and their coach." was my response.
A smile came to his face. "Oh," I said, "That's what I'm missing,
isn't it. I want something to give myself to fully and lose myself in
it. I'm crying because I want their passion."
This was very helpful direction for me. It released me from a stilted
approach to my life and challenged me to plumb the depths of my own
passion. That's why my avocation has become songwriting and musical
theater writing. I don't get paid much money for my passion, though I
dream. But I don't weep at sporting events--though I still tear up
sometimes--but I have a deeper sense about what I need to pursue in
life to be more the person that God created me to be.
Rev. Denny Moon, Senior Minister, East Granby Congregational
Church, East Granby
PEOPLE HAVE OFTEN asked me to define the difference between
pastoral counseling and pastoral care. Pastoral care is usually
provided by a pastor or an ordained member of the clergy in a parish
setting. Pastoral counseling is generally provided by a pastoral
counselor in a therapeutic setting.
Parish ministers are often the first line of defense in dealing with
the personal problems of parishioners. Church members commonly seek
out clergy to discuss such issues as bereavement, family dynamics or
marital difficulties. Although some parish ministers also double as
pastoral counselors, most do not. Most parish ministers neither have
the time nor the expertise to engage in long-term pastoral counseling.
A rule followed by many parish ministers is that if they cannot help a
parishioner solve a problem in one or two visits they need to think
about referring them to a pastoral counselor. Most (but not all)
pastoral counselors are also ordained clergy. In addition to having
extensive training in the area of counseling, most pastoral counselors
are also unencumbered by the other duties and demands of parish
ministry such as preaching, parish administration, etc…
If the parish minister refers a parishioner to a pastoral counselor,
his or her work is not done. On the contrary, the parish minister
needs to continue to provide pastoral care even though the parishioner
may be seeing a pastoral counselor on a regular basis. The purpose of
this continued contact is not to compete with the pastoral counselor
but to provide additional support and care to the parishioner. In a
sense, the pastor and the pastoral counselor work as part of a team.
Together with family, friends and fellow parishioners, they form the
vital core of a parishioner’s support group.
While pastoral counseling usually takes place at a set time in a
confidential setting, pastoral care can take place almost any time in
any setting (via personal contact, telephone or even e-mail). In both
instances however, the intention remains the same—to convey the
assurance of God’s presence, the promise of God’s love, and the belief
in God’s forgiveness.
Far from being seen as competitors, pastoral care and pastoral
counseling should really be viewed as compliments; two sides of the
same coin—an attempt not only to achieve a psychological insight, but
to recall that through the saving power of God in Jesus Christ, the
hope of new life is always possible.
Rev. Rick Huleatt, Senior. Minister, First Church in Windsor,
Holidays are “holy days.” These are days when we gather
together to remember people, places, and events. Laden with emotions,
we join family and friends to celebrate. Often we bring gifts, and
receive them from others. Sometimes we carry baggage, seen and unseen.
Occasionally we are alone, or remembering people who aren’t there; and
at times we’ll feel lonely, even when we’re in a crowded room.
Living in a world, which is so physical, material, and intellectual,
we can forget that our lives are so much more than what we see, or
what we think. We lose touch with our feelings, stuff our emotions, or
fly into a rage. We teeter under the heavy weight of grief, or the
despair of painful relationships. We deny that life is a many-splendored
thing, that joy involves pain, and that tears make rainbows. We think
that we are the only ones who are “going through this” and that we
must “struggle through on our own.”
Life is a journey that involves the body, mind, heart, and spirit. And
it is a journey that is best made with others. Sometimes we need
people who don’t know us, or love us, to counsel us. We need people
who are trained in helping us unravel the complicated webs of our
lives, and explore the holy mysteries of life and death. We need
people who will remind us that, regardless of our circumstances, there
is always a Holy Presence, a Higher Power, Someone Greater, who is
there with us, through thick and thin. God, our help in ages past, our
hope for years to come, is the Divine Spirit, who can be our Pastoral
Counselor and Comforter at these times.
Pastoral counselors are human companions, who also point to our Divine
Companion. And the Pastoral Counseling Center is a place where we can
speak confidentially about some of our life problems, which are common
to us all. It is a place where “spiritual resources are blended with
the best of psychological insight in the search for resolutions to
life issues.” Make your holidays “holy days.” Start this new year in a
healthy way. Get physical: pick up the phone. Don’t think about it;
just do it. Express your feelings in a safe place, with professional
people. And maybe you’ll unload some of your baggage, and receive a
special gift from God: a new heart and a renewed spirit within you.
The Rev. Nancy E. Gossling, Rector St. James’ Episcopal Church,
Glastonbury
Life can be filled with the wonder of God’s steadfast love –
the joys and blessings of God’s gift of life and creation. But at
times, the mystery of that creation – be it struggles with illness or
uncertainty, tragedy or confusion, life’s inevitable twists and turns
– often leaves us feeling lost, alone, unsure of where to turn. At
such times, a listening ear, a caring presence, an insightful fellow
journeyer can make all the difference. And that is exactly what the
Pastoral Counseling Center does and can provide to so many of us. Year
after year, the staff of the Center has “been there” for members of
First Church and the wider community whom they so faithfully serve.
Life is filled with the wonder of God’s steadfast love – and that love
can be found in the ministry of the Pastoral Counseling Center!
-Rev. David Taylor, Senior Minister, First Church of Christ,
Congregational. Glastonbury |
